As he hung on that cross, he would periodically push himself up to somehow get air flowing into his lungs. As he pushed himself up, excruciating pain shot through his entire body, but the instinct for air and survival was greater than the pain that it cost him.
Although this sight was too much for me to watch, I knew that he did it for me. He promised to give me life as a result of his death. But why should it have been such a cruel death? Is this what I deserved? But what could I give him? My life? But is my life really mine? Mine to give? What do I have that was not given to me? Nothing.
Even the life that was given to me has been wrecked due to my sin and rebellion. So, what do I have to give him? Just the brokenness and shame of my life. That’s all. But He took it from me and exchanged it for a new life. What he promised was abundant and eternal life. Wow, what an exchange!
If you are a person who has not experienced this love of Jesus in your life, please go to the page need a change?
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As I stood there looking at the cross, I could not walk any closer. The sight was too repulsive and it made me sick to my stomach. Blood was flowing down his face from his head, from his torn beard, and so many parts of his body, even from his feet that were nailed to the cross with a spike. Oh, that reminds me of the spikes in his hands from which more blood flowed.
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Hooding ceremony at Baccalaureate service “Congratulations upon completion of your five year adventurous journey. Certainly it is a job well done. You have ‘fought the good fight.’ You have finished well. May the Lord continue to use you more than ever before for His glory. So glad to share the journey with you! Looking forward to all that God has for us in the future.”
Annie has been faithfully working away at this degree as we pastored the church, taught at Faith Seminary, and dealt with lots of important family issues.It was during her studies that both my parents became ill. My mother struggled with cancer for over two years. Annie stayed by her side and ministered to her till the end when my mother finally passed away. Soon after, my father had kidney failure and had a long struggle with dialysis and treatments. Annie spent lots of time at the hospital with him too. Later he moved in with my brother Charlie when he and his wife took up much of the responsibility of taking care of him. My father finally passed away and went to be with the Lord. Also during the last five years, I had severe complications with my lower disks and had several situations where I was bed-ridden up to three months. During these times, Annie dutifully took up the entire load of the household. What a load to bear! Yet she held on and kept up with all her responsibilities including being a good mother to two teenage children.Another important responsibility that she worked on was the children’s ministry of our church, Lifetime Vineyard. Sunday School, VBS, and all other special events went on smoothly under her direction. And oh, yes, Inner Healing and Deliverance sessions were not put aside either. Her passion to see people delivered and live full lives for Christ kept her in that path too. She has also spent lots of time one on with people personally and over the phone with many of the people of the church.Finally, it was during the same time that I was working on my studies at the University of South Africa. Although much of my work was done by distance, that meant lots of my time spent with books as well, along with several weeks in Bangalore and a few months in Kottayam working on my dissertation. She took on a full load during all these times. Now, she has completed the Ph.D. with flying colors…3.936 GPA…wow. I am very proud of you my dear! Try this link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l6pbT7QMFTs
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Two years and three months after my mother passed away, my father has joined her. Pappa passed away on 17 June 2009 at 7am. He was moved out of the ICU on the 16th since there was nothing else the doctors could do for him. He had gotten to the point where there was no more response when he is called. After he was moved to the room, we tried to make him as comfortable as possible. Since the neurologist had told me that he may still have his hearing, I called Charlie and asked him to bring some CD’s with old songs that he likes, and the audio Bible in Malayalam. We played that in the room throughout the day, in hopes that he would be able to hear. He had said many times that since his eyesight is poor now, he cannot read the Bible anymore. That was a great loss for him…not to be able to read the Bible. I had always tried to get him to listen to the audio Bible, but he always said, “yes, but its not the same as reading it for yourself.”During the night, I was in the hospital room with Pappa. Since his breathing was heavy, I followed his breathing throughout the night. I woke up many times and would listen carefully for the sound of his breathing. Finally, in the morning at 7am, he breathed his last, to be with his Lord that he loved so much.
In 1998, when my wife spoke with my mother about the death of both of her parents, Mummy recited this verse: “Lord, you have been our dwelling place throughout all generations” Psalm 90:1. It is good to know that our parents served and trusted God and passed on that faith to us. That gives us hope to transfer the same faith on to the next generation.
Thanks to all who prayed for us during this difficult time. I know that it was the prayers of so many that helped us to gain strength in God. Thanks for the many emails, sms, and blog comments that were left (including chat that I did not reply). Thank you.
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This “report” was written when my father was hospitalized after a fall which caused a concussion in his head…
Currently, my father is in critical condition. There seems to be no change in his situation. It seems that the convulsions that he experienced may have done further damage to his brain, especially the left part of the brain. This has affected the right side of his body, and its movements. Nevertheless, his whole body seems to lack any movement. When we call him, he only opens his eyes, and nothing more.
The Nephrologist and Neurologist are working together on a solution (a Cardiologist is also involved), but if by this weekend, the situation does not improve, there is nothing more that could be done for him. At that point, he may be moved to a regular room from the ICU for Palliative care. A special thanks to all who are praying for us at this difficult time. Pray especially for us that we will be able to make wise decisions at the appropriate time. Also, do not feel compelled to call us on the phone…an email (or a comment on this blog) notifying us that you are praying for us is sufficient. Again, thanks for backing us up with your prayers. -
The operation went well. I spoke to the doctor just a minute ago. He said that at least 90% of the clotted blood has been removed. The bleeding was not in the brain, just within the skull. The rest of the blood that is left will be drained out gradually, and if necessary, they will need to go in again and remove more. He is responding well, but still weak from the surgery. His response is not fully normal, but that will take some time. There were various complicating factors such as his age, kidney problems, diabetes, blood pressure, and other items. The doctors were not able to give him general anesthesia, so only local anesthesia was given. He is still in the ICU. Let’s pray that he will recover quickly.He needs to be hospitalized for at least two more weeks to get things settled. The irony is that he has been going to this same hospital three times per week for dialysis. The one hour plus drive there is quite a drain for him at his age and his condition. But this is the closest hospital with a full time Nephrologist on staff. Kerala, with 31.8 million people, has only 15 nephrologists for the entire state. That is quite an alarming situation, and that affects the care given to the patients. Most doctors leave the country and go abroad for work.
For the next month, the blood thinning medicines cannot be used for him, which makes his dialysis more difficult. They say that this may result in less quality of the purification of the blood that takes place through the dialysis.
Thanks again for your prayers.
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So the waiting continues as the results of my dissertation will only come in March. As my work has been completed, Annie began her dissertation in January. She is planning to finish within two years. In the mean time, we were involved in several other exciting things.
On the 2nd of January, we both taught at a seminar for Sunday School Teachers from a group of churches called PMG Church. All of the PMG churches from the Trivandrum, Kerala area gathered for this training event. As far as I can remember, this is a first for us doing some “team teaching” outside of our local church setting. Their response was good, and of course, we hope it benefited them.
During January 5-11, we had the convention and graduation at Faith Theological Seminary. The convention lasts for the entire week, and the graduation was on Friday morning, with 85 students graduating. It is great to have watched these students develop spiritually, theologically, and as individuals during their time here.
The following week, our friends from the Delhi Vineyard came and visited us. Our acquaintance goes back to our first week in Florida (1992) as we were about to begin planting the Sunrise Vineyard Christian Fellowship. They stayed with us in our home in Kerala and visited a few of the Carecells and spoke at the missionary chapel at Faith Theological Seminary. On Sunday, he spoke at the church in both of the services. Their stay and ministry among us was a blessing to us.
Nathan has his final exams for the 9th standard, and Sharon will begin her exams next week. For Nathan, he will be going on to the 10th after his exams. This school finishes the 9th early so they can begin the classes for the next year early. Their plan is to get them prepared for some major examinations that come up after the 10th grade.
Please pray that we will stay faithful to the call upon our lives. Thanks for your prayers for us as we endeavor to be faithful in the work God has entrusted to us.
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After five years of work, my thesis is finally complete. I sent it yesterday, 30 November 2008. For the last few months, I have been intensely focusing on this work. I am sure that you figured out that the picture above is the table I’ve been using for study purposes. As a result of this work, many things have been put aside, such as emails, phone calls, and of course, this blog. I would like to share with you just the preface from the thesis given below:
Preface
More than just an academic exercise, the work on this thesis has been a personal journey as well. Interacting with the character of Jacob has opened up many thoughts regarding life and how we live it. Jacob is depicted as a man who kept moving regardless of the turbulent circumstances he faced at every turn. Through the rich traditions handed down to us, Jacob’s life speaks volumes…reminding us that there is hope in the midst of hopelessness.
Most of the time spent on this academic pursuit was done with the normal load of everyday life: Teaching at Faith Theological Seminary, pastoring Lifetime Church, Missions in North India, and of course family life. Therefore this final production is the result of a few years of interaction not only with the literature mentioned in the Bibliography, but also with all the burdens of a full-time schedule. For me it has been a process of learning and developing in every area.
In addition to the normal, there was the unexpected. For over two years, my mother battled with Cancer, and finally passed away on 26 March 2007. In essence, about half of the time spent on my studies involved constant hospital visits which required a four hour one-way drive each time. Also in 2007, we dealt with my father’s kidney failure, and the subsequent dialysis three times a week. My father-in-law’s life and ministry was certainly an inspiration to me as he is quite adept in handling numerous responsibilities.
Special thanks are due to my promoter Dr. Willem Boshoff. I was simply blessed not only as a result of his great insight into the areas of my research, but also because of his accessibility and patience with me during the last few years of study. The library staff at UNISA has been gracious in their timely response to requests for books and articles.
I wish to express my gratefulness to the administration of Faith Theological Seminary for granting me flexibility in my schedule and a lighter teaching load during the years of my study, especially during the last two years while I focused more on my thesis. Adoor Vineyard Church also felt the burden as I backed off from many things and became less accessible to the people, especially during the last few months. Along with church members, many friends and family also encouraged and prayed diligently.
My family certainly had a prominent role and put up with so much during the years of my study. A special appreciation to my wife Annie for her prayerful understanding and willingness to carry a heavier load at home as my focus turned to my thesis (as she also began her doctoral studies during this time). In fact, even during the early years of our marriage, I sat there for hours without end translating Hebrew and Greek texts. Both our children Nathan and Sharon were faithful to pray for me daily and were an encouragement to me. They would constantly ask me “how many pages have you finished, Daddy?”
Of course, most importantly, I thank my God (the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob) for enabling me to complete something I thought would never be possible.
Alexi E. George
Adoor, Kerala, India
November 2008
http://www.yourBarnabas.com
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This “hi-tech” device pictured here is intended for my back pain. That bag contains four kilos of sand to provide a consistent traction to my back, by way of a belt strapped around my waist. The MRI report shows that I have three disks that are bulging.
Problems with my back began in 1996 on the highway from Fort Lauderdale to Miami, FL. I was half-way to my destination on I-75 when a sudden excruciating pain flashed through my back to the rest of my body. Within seconds, the pain was taken over by feelings of fear since I had no idea what was happening to me. I could barely move my legs, and somehow, I got the vehicle pulled over to the side of the road. I finished that day of work just suffering through the day with the severe pain. Since then, these bouts of pain would return periodically. But in the last two years, it has been more frequent. Of course, our challenging road conditions here in India would add to the problem, especially for a back that is not used to such roads.
So far, the best solution is rest and traction for my back. After the pain is gone, I would need to resume my lower back exercises and walking. God’s work shouldn’t be limited with back problems. I’ve got to do whatever it takes! -
It was an early morning flight out of Dallas on my way to San Jose. Expecting the flight to be lengthy, and knowing that breakfast would not be served, I purchased breakfast from one of the terminal shops. The cashier gave me my breakfast in a brown paper bag with my choice of Orange Juice.
As I entered the aircraft and walked to my seat, I was a bit confused about my seat number. Before boarding, I had looked at my boarding pass and noticed that my seat number was 6C, which I presumed to be a bulk-head seat on the front row of the economy class. To my surprise, I realized that I was bumped up to a first class seat, which occasionally happens because of my mileage accrued with constant flights. That’s when I remembered that the first class section serves meals to the passengers unlike the economy seats where only beverages are served.
So I settled down in my first class seat with my brown paper bag of breakfast. Soon after take-off, I proceeded to eat my breakfast sandwich as the flight attendant proceeded to prepare the meals for the first class passengers. It was after I finished my sandwich that I was offered the “first class” breakfast. It was certainly not like mine. They served it on a tray draped with a nice cloth that gave it a classy look. As the breakfast was offered to me, I pointed to my brown bag and said “no thanks.” Thus I sat there watching the others eat a nice breakfast while I sat there with my brown bag.
I took out my boarding pass and noticed the words “FIRST” written in bold capital letters. Although the printing was clear and obvious, I somehow failed to recognize its value. I didn’t expect to be in first class. Instead, I went through the trouble of purchasing my own breakfast when a better one was already provided for me.
Our life often transpires in a similar fashion. We all have sinned and carry the burden of the guilt for many years; even those who have accepted Christ. As we go on in life, the weight of the guilt gets heavier. Its impact on our life becomes more obvious as it affects our attitudes and thought patterns, which in turn affects our behavior. We do many things to deal with the symptoms, but we don’t recognize that it is a burden of guilt.
Jesus said, “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest” (Matthew 11:28). He goes on to specify that it is rest for our souls. He said these words in the context of repentance from sins. When we are burdened with the guilt of sin, it is our soul that carries the weight. This is why we often don’t recognize what’s really happening to us. We may claim that it is bad luck, bad circumstances, bad relationships, or a host of other possibilities.
Jesus is the only one who can take away the burden of guilt from our souls. If we go to him and confess our sins, he promised that he would take away that burden of guilt. So what is that you’re carrying in your brown paper bag? Your own solution to your burdens? Now is the time to give that up and accept the forgiveness and rest that Jesus offers for your soul. -
For several months now, my blogging has been on hold for quite a good reason. This is my fourth year working on a doctoral program with the University of South Africa. The time has come to finish my Dissertation. I am only 1/3 of the way on my writing. All the foundational work has been done, and it is just a matter of separating the time to write.For those who might be interested, I’m working on the D.Th. degree in Old Testament. My focus is on the Pentateuch, specifically, I’m researching the five times that Jacob the patriarch has set up altars and worshiped. The title of my dissertation will be Canaanite Influence on Israelite Worship. I hope to finish by the end of February. Maybe afterwards, I’ll resume my regular blogging.
yourBarnabas.com 